If anyone is a dreamer, it’s my younger brother Charlie. He longs to be many things.
“I would like to be an astronaut, a king, a man who tests all the crayon colors, the guy who decorates Easter eggs, wait actually, let’s just make me the Easter bunny, a kid in a CapriSun commercial (because they are flat), and a dolphin trainer.”
However, there’s one thing that stresses him out about fulfilling these dreams: college.
“I am NOT going to college. All you do is move in and out and in and out."
Though I am not planning on being the Easter bunny, I can definitely relate to my brother’s stress about who I am going to be.
Or who God wants me to be.
A couple years ago, I had my own dream: to go to law school, focus on family law, and start an adoption agency.
And when I felt God pulling me elsewhere, I defended myself.
“God, ministry is ministry!!! I’m doing Your work no matter what!! Come on, like this is something I would really enjoy. It’s all for Your glory and I am convinced that this would glorify You!!! I promise!!”
Have you ever tried to tell the Creator of the universe what was up? I don’t recommend it.
After my selfish campaign, I heard something like this:
“My child, I am calling you elsewhere because I am asking you to go outside your comfort zone. Adoption is near and dear to your heart and always will be, but I am asking you to open up your heart to other things, to other people, and to other places. Let MY will be done, and you will see my mercies everyday.”
And "elsewhere" felt like the medical field. Y’all, tonight I mixed up a cheekbone and jawbone. . . I mean, if I’m stretching as far as the medical field, I might as well go ahead and be a cheerleader again.
…Anyway, it’s really not my life to control. To think about my selfishness and all that I demand from this Savior of mine makes me wonder how He still cares for me more than anyone does. It’s an undeserving grace that is freely given to me and to everyone that trusts in Him. And it fills my heart with an inner peace that no plan of my own can.
In Habbakuk 1, Habbakuk is complaining to the Lord about unanswered prayers—12 years of them, to be exact. And the Lord responds in Habbakuk 1:5 with words of provision, words of hope, words of a plan more prominent than Habbakuk’s.
“Look at the nations and watch—and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told.”
I may have not believed God at first when He told me to pursue healthcare, whether that be in nursing or medicine, but He has never failed me in the past. He gives me new mercies every morning—often visible when I'm backing out in a parking lot—and I look forward to these mercies to come.
I guess it gets a little stressful when you think about the fact that I may be drawing your blood in a few years, or when you think about Charlie as an astronaut, but it’s comforting to know that the Creator of the world holds us in the palm of His hands.
I pray that today, you would open your heart and your mind to all that He has to offer. If you would have been telling me four years ago that I would be writing a blog, I would have said, "Actually, can you make me a cheerleader?" But that’s how He works. He plucks us from our insecurities, our worries, and our heartaches, and puts us in a place of His faithfulness, His provision, and His goodness.
His plan always beats ours.